Why do I feel differently about coin people in person than I do online?

Whatever you say, Rhino!

Chris

 

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uh..... yeah, that's what I've heard.

 

We exist! I'm 20 but I don't know anyone personally who is serious about it. Just folks on here. We're few and far between I guess.
But anyways, I feel for ya JCB. I know plenty of guys who I refuse to hang out around because everything is a contest to show off for the ladies. My view on one-upmanship is that if you are both doing something you love, it shouldn't matter who has the better one. Of course the alpha-male crap throws that in the trashcan. Frankly, if someone has a "better" collection than me I'd LOVE to see it as I thoroughly enjoy looking at coins. They're history in the form of a metal round disc.

Oh, and I'm exactly the same in person as online, more or less. I ramble a lot, and I'm pretty friendly and outgoing. But if I am out in public somewhere where I don't know anyone, I'm uber quiet.

 

Oh my, I wasn't the only one then and don't feel as bad now.

 

Umm.....does that include Friday's?

Chris

 

Meeting people online is different, maybe there are traits that you don't like see. Maybe they don't bathe and stink and flies are surrounding them. Or they spit every time they talk or they have bad breath.
I don't think you would want to meet a person like this. But online you don't know and feel more comfortable.

 

Relax jcb, you're normal. People your own age are your competition and one ups-man-ship is the order of the day. As long as it doesn't get carried away I wouldn't be so sensitive about it. The only statements you made that I might focuss on would be expectations, and another that sounds a bit paranoid. Expectations are nothing but a big con job a person inflicts upon themself. No one on this Earth owes anyone else on this Earth an obligation to be someone other than who they are. Harboring expectations do nothing but bring dissapointment. This doesn't mean for you to tolerate bad behavior, it means stop setting yourself up with expectations no one knows you harbor and couldn't or wouldn't measure up to even if they did ... period.

Next is the suspicion you express when someone asks a harmless question like "how long have you been collecting." If there's reason to be suspicious from past experience, that's OK. More than likely it's just as I said, a harmless question ... and perhaps you're too focussed on meeting THEIR expectations. Don't try, it's not important anyway.

For what it's worth, everyone here has felt the same as you've expressed at one time or another. We'd all like to preach humility and profess to live it, but few ever do. There are times when I'm humble, but often one ups-man-ship prevails and that's especially true as you age and reminiss. It would seem the older I get ...

The Better I Was!

Rick

 

I know I suck at talking on the phone, can't carry a conversation to save my life. As for the in person skills, I am definitely awkward, but I can get over that. Unlike here, I prefer to talk in person and see their faces and hear their emotions. You can't get that from an emoticon, yes you can get the idea, but never the whole gist of it. I do like meeting other collectors because I love to look at their collections and see what they have and what I really like, so I can (sometimes) make an offer or just admire it. I am with you, when you say it is nothing like reading the black and white text, but I just love talking to people in person. When I see them, I am less threatened or and more aware of them and what their personality is like.

I can read peoples personalities and adapt to make them like me, one of my "gifts", but I can't do it with the black and white.

~Cannyn

 

When I find myself experiencing this (and I do), I force myself to do what I do not want to do.

I have found that others are feeling the same way many times. Ignore them and press in.

Relationships with people are really the only things on this earth that have tangible value.

 

Where'd you get the emoticon of Doug hitting someone on the head with a hammer?

 

Perhaps you should contact

By the way, paragraphs are your friend.

 

I have a small library of emoticons. This one was from the "Doug" section.

 

That character Dr. Phil is some sort of gender traitor. He can be attributed to a master manipulator to the female psyche. I mentioned this thread to a buddy of mine who collects autographs, and his reply was " Drink a beer."

 

Holy crap.......

 

Jason, its a good question. I don't know why it is about the whole male ego thing. I have a cousin I am close to like a brother. Always kidding around, etc. I have always done better than him financially, but now his job is paying about as well as mine, and with his wife's income they make more than me, and they got a great deal on a house in foreclosure. I just start to feel competitive, and I have no reason whatsoever to be competitive with him. I think its just ancient, "leader of the pack" pre-programmed into all males.

Regarding in person versus online, I actually like online. You look like a pretty big guy Jason, so you can probably relate. When someone sees you in person they are kind of intimidated if you are larger than them, and not as open to discussion. I just think all of the stuff related to size differences affects interactions besides all of the other stuff like body language. I find myself on the other side of this with my friend's brother. He is 6'10" and about 320 pounds. For some reason I keep thinking of him as slow when I talk to him, but he is a bright man. I think the world just has this view of all bigger guys as "lenny's", and to be smart a guy has to be short and skinny, (preferably with glasses). All of this "crud" is being dealt with in person, making it harder to actually listen to the other person. After a while it goes away, as I find a friend at the coin club who is 6'4" I can listen to just as easily now as another who is shorter and heavier. I got past the physical and simply love to learn from both of these respected experts.

Just my view of it.

Chris