That seems perfectly reasonable on his part and cannot blame him for not wanting to chat up every person that walks in the door on the first meeting. Glad to hear it worked out for you. Very well said. While we all love to get a great deal and they do exist from time to time out there, a lot of times those "deals" sell for a lower price for a reason.
I think Paul's post covers it the best. Off topic but, other things affect the price of a coin. There is "market presence". There is also the state of the dealers finances. If I need cash badly, I will be much more amiable to selling at a lower price.
Paul nailed it - learn from knowledgeable dealers. I'll add "even if it's not an area you are particularly interested in". If the man or woman is an expert in something and willing to share? Soak it in.
I highly encourage everyone to buy, use, and bring their own loupe. Every brand and magnification will have a different look and feel. Once you get used to your own loupe, you can probably do a pretty good job with someone else's - but it just isn't the same. No respectable dealer will ever criticize you, or prevent you from using your own loupe. If they do, they are not someone you should do business with. Yes. So much yes. Arm yourself with as much knowledge as you can. Knowledge is the best tool in your kit. Many dealers will also give you loops.... as in, just enough rope to hang yourself. For the most part, dealers know (or think they know) how to grade. Once they've written a grade on a holder, they are pretty set on it. Chances are also good that if there is a problem with the coin, they've seen it. I find it tacky to point out flaws or argue about the grade with the dealer. Haggling the price is perfectly acceptable, but if the dealer has it graded as an AU, he probably has it priced as an AU. If I grade it as an EF, and want to buy it for an EF price, there is a really good chance that he will not come down that low. If I am too far apart on the grade (and hence the price), I won't even bother making an offer or haggling - it will just waste both of our times. Ultimately, in response to the OP, the biggest rule for life applies to etiquette in coin shops as well: Don't be an A**hole. Given that you are asking the question, this doesn't appear to be a problem for you. Some people struggle with this. (I am not necessarily talking about anyone here ) I'm sure that as long as you are honest and polite, most dealers will respect that.
This is a really good point that nobody else has made just yet. For example, I was looking for a particular coin at a show once. I walked around and looked at like 8 different ones. One I looked at was marked MS-66 and, IMO was no better than an ugly MS-64. I didn't even ask about the price and walked away. I didn't question their grade or badmouth their coin, but I knew I wasn't going to deal on this coin no matter what. The coin I ended up buying was a nice MS-64 with a good original skin. The price difference was not huge in dollar terms, but the MS-66 price would likely have been almost double the MS-64 price, and I would not have been nearly as happy with that coin as I am with the one I took home (which I am thrilled with). I disagree about pointing out flaws on coins, however. If it's done tactfully and respectfully, there should be no issue on either side. "What's going on in the left obverse field here?" or "Is this a scratch underneath the bust?" are perfectly acceptable questions IMO. And some coins almost universally have some kind of flaw or another (early American and colonial copper being a good example). The bottom line is that buying and selling coins is a business transaction, and both sides should treat it as such. Deal fairly and respectfully with people and they will typically do the same.
The overwhelming response from you all was be polite. And I was. He did not talk--with off comments about coins or what not. So, he was opposite the dealer who referred me to him for bullion. But I take to heart the info here about starting a relationship. I feel like going back he will be more talkative. What a strange business. It isn't in the best neighborhood and this guy has quite a stock, so he must be very guarded. I will go back. I bought some 10 oz bars, liberties for the hell of it (at the above spot--$4-- they are not really a good investment from this dealer) and the coin I was excited about was a common date, nice looking double eagle for my wife's Valentine's gift. I didn't haggle, just looked and made my order. Odd, since I have never made such a purchase before. Now, silver is up well over a dollar what I paid so now to watch it fall before I go back in... IF it does so. Weird what's going on with the market and oil. I can imagine investors wanting some bullion at this time. It's always a hedge in a bear market.