LCS-Comment on Comments

Hi,
I went to my monthly local coin show yesterday. I'd been looking forward to it for a couple of weeks and had a list of possible buys. I'll admit I am usually the only female collector I see on the customer side of the tables. I was asked where my husband was twice and told while I was browsing coins at another table that the jewelry was on the far side of the table and I might want to look there.
I didn't buy much. It soured me on being there.

My comment-my money has no gender so please treat me like any other collector.

Now that being said, CoinTalk dealers/collectors have been fantastic and treated me with respect. I just wanted to post this with the hope that I can help with one person's view and future comments. Thanks for your time.

 

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Don’t even let that bother you. Some may feel threatened that you have a better eye.

 

Easy fix.

Just smile back, take a picture with your phone & thank them for their ignorance

 

Interesting, why the picture?

 

Coin dealers seem to be mostly older men. And, like a lot of older men, seem to be rather chauvinistic.
It's rare that I meet a friendly coin dealer to begin with. I couldn't imagine having to deal with them as a woman.
Sorry you had to deal with idiots like that. Just remember, they are old and will die off sooner rather than later. Then some younger (hopefully) more respectful person will take their spot.

 

Please contact Ms. Sperber, Legend, via forwarding your Post, and give her the names of the Dealers involved. I am certain there will not be similar incidents in the future.

I like the Human Female (except the ones that are friends of my wife).

 

A picture being taken can hurt their feelings in the same way that yours were hurt.
( Him; why are you taking my picture ? You; why are you being sexist ? )
It also helps if you want to make a complaint.

I grew up in a time were a quick retort was a requirement when dealing with idiots & ignorant people.

Shoot them down in an instant & watch them squirm.

 

I'm a big fan of telling that person what I think about their business acumen and general intelligence level, but that tends to get me in trouble

You could have said something to the effect "so I guess that means you don't have any x, y, or z for sale. Do you know of any dealers who might carry those coins". That should be a safe retort, especially if you're the non confrontational type (not me).

Also, when you do find a friendly/helpful dealer, tell them the story. Nothing like embarrassing that type of person in front of their peers.

I used to be active as a collector and small mail order dealer when I was in HS years ago, and would occasionally get similar comments (I looked young).

 

I don't go to local shows or even local dealers. The last local show I attended was in Houston. I got treated like I wasn't even there. The dealers and many of the customers are actually nothing more than a clique. Collectors of all kinds couldn't get close to the tables because of the cliquey activities.

Now, as far as how a woman may get treated - my wife is licensed to carry a concealed handgun. She has been for a long time. She is also a very good shot, outscores me most times. She went alone into a major gun store in Houston and was treated like a dumb blonde, no offense intended. Of course, she walked out. There was a woman with respectable disposable income and a real interest in the products walking out the door.

A few weeks later I was at a gun show and there was that dealer. He tried to get my attention for a sale. I told him that my wife won't let me shop at his business anymore. And I told him the story.

 

To the husband comments I did say ' Why? I'm the collector' and to the jewelry comment I said 'so?'. A good retort is the best but when I'm surprised they never come my way

 

That's great that you did that with the gun dealer, thanks for sharing it.

 

I always think of what I should've said well after the fact.
One day I will be quick on the draw.

 

Those are the idiot types that don't get my money.........

 

I sympathize with you and other women who get treated this way. My ex used to get angry every time she ran into a situation like yours. One time she was interviewing for a job and the old fogey (well my perspective has changed now that I fit that category now) told her to ask her husband (me) for permission to work the late hours. I was really impressed that she didn't rip him a new one.

If I was in your position, I wouldn't even consider buying from any dealer who treated me in this fashion. In fact, I would go as far as mention this to the show organizers.

 

I think some do not realize how many sales they are missing. And you never know when one is willing to pay a top dollar for something. People buy as a gift, for the kid etc. Some don’t get it I guess. Their loss.

 

As a former retail food store manager I can tell you first hand that "you are the boss" you deserve to be treated with respect !
Customer service is job #1 .... your spending your money... and every coin in your pocket is as good as anyone else's.

Just like "pretty woman" big mistake....big mistake... ! Bling bling $$
Just remember a good come back are great....but sometimes it takes an' out smarting' to make an old fool realize he's just that an old fool.
Everyone no matter how fat their wallets get the same respect ...... no excuses.

 

Well said!

 

As a young man, I was a first time visitor to a major coin show. I expressed my interest in Byzantine coins to a dealer who handed me a coin, and asked if I had an example of Basil the second. The coin depicted Constantine VIII. I politely replied “That’s interesting. I would have thought this was from his brother, Constantine the eighth.” I went on to acquire many beautiful coins from that dealer in the following years.

Years later, I came to wonder whether he made a legitimate mistake, or was vetting me. Perhaps I looked a bit young to be buying Byzantine gold. Perhaps my interest was frivolous and a waste of his time, or worse perhaps I planned some sleight of hand to pocket a shiny gold piece.

It must be tough to sit on the dealer’s side of the table. Some caution when an unfamiliar collector approaches would be imperative, yet being dismissive or curt with a potential customer who doesn’t fit the stereotype could cost one a sale, as well as being unjust and unkind.

I assume all dealers subject each person who stops at his or her table to some sort of mental calculus to estimate the customer’s seriousness, honesty, and the potential for a sale. Assuming there are no serious female numismatists would be a bad algorithm, though. I am sorry that happened to you, @trish.

 

Sorry that happened to you. Next time that happens tell that guy off. Tell him you are here to buy coins and not here to be insulted by a sexist jerk. Then say you will never get my business ever. If a dealer insults me in anyway at all....I just go to the next table. A have dealt with jerk dealers before. If they are very rude to me I will tell them off and say to them that I only buy from professional dealers only not jerks like you. You can tell the event organizers too. I mostly go to Vegas coin shows. The dealers there are very professional. These dealers are very nice and are eager to sell you their coins. Most will give discounts if you ask for them. Ask for small amounts off. If you ask for too much of a discount it insults them.

 

Dont feel to bad many dealers do the same type of stuff with younger collectors and by younger I mean anyone that looks younger than their 40s or 50s. There's a lot of reason why a lot of these dealers are losing business to online sales and their attitudes is certainly one of them