Sound like me. I don’t ask my wife about her five closets full of clothes. She don’t ask me about my coins....... Having said that, it occurs to me that my coins and PM’s are mentioned in my will. Her clothes are not mentioned in hers.... Hhhmmmmm.....
Well I guess the lesson is, don't build coin collections if you're married or have girlfriends, LOL. Of course I'm being totally facetious here. But it does bring the mind that when my ex and I broke up I had to sell every coin that I had spent years since 2010 collecting. And I had a very nice collection. At least for somebody on my budget anyways. It's been two years, since I've been able to buy a coin. But all that's changing soon. I'm going to make my first big purchase in the next 4 weeks and I'm having trouble deciding what to buy, LOL
My heartfelt thanks to (All) who posted there views and ideas and suggestions. True to form I didn’t even begin to divulge all the details of my 43 year marriage and the surprise of what appears to be a forthright soon divorce. I’m going to drop the subject in here and take advice of getting a good lawyer first thing. Until then, again thanks to all for your advice, suggestions etc. Bless you all!
The worst nightmare of every collector is to look down from heaven and watch your widow sell your prized possessions for what you told her you paid for them.
Anything obtained before the marriage is legally yours to keep. Anything obtained during the marriage is 50/50% . In my case since I had numi and semi numi stuff and spot was way down I made a deal and gave her the house and business and I kept the coins.
I'm going to go back on what I said, and post again. This is not necessarily true. In community property states, the division is automatically 50-50; however, in equitable distribution estates, the division is one that is equitable and not necessarily 50-50. I'll leave it there.
Rick, I don’t think you’re being fair here. We don’t know anything about their situation and I see a lot of assumptions are being made. Everyone is assuming that: 1. Divorce is inevitable and it’s the OP’s wife’s fault. 2. The wife has some crazy expensive collection equal to the OP’s. 3. Asking for half of the collection amassed while together is selfish. 4. The OP is the “good guy” and the wife is the “bad guy”. 5. It’s perfectly acceptable to lie and hide things from your spouse. 6. Every situation is the same. I have had the pleasure of being married twice, and in my divorce had to give the value of all accrued coins in that marriage to my ex. My (current) wife doesn’t collect shoes, purses or anything of any real value (great that everyone thinks this is all women collect though). If we were to divorce, the coins we own are the only thing we have invested any real money into. I don’t know the OP, or his wife, but if my wife came up and asked me to sell my collection so we could split it, I wouldn’t be running to a lawyer, I’d be running to the dining table so we could discuss more. I love my collection, but it forever comes second to my wife and family. If it ever came down to my collection of my family, the collection would be the first to go. My advice for anyone who thinks their collection is more important than their family: don’t get married. There are so many things out there more important than our collections.
You want advice? DO NOT LIE TO YOUR LAWYER!.....She or he will have enough problems without trying to overcome a surprise in court. Do not under estimate your wife, she may have been planning this for a long time and has had legal advice with regard to what she needed to have ready. That is just one possible surprise your Lawyer may have to over come. You have already made a big mistake by airing your problem in coin talk, she may have copies of it.
Me being female. I understand this 50 50 thing. But the coins are yours. Give them to your girlfriend for safe keeping
Don't do what I did marry the same one twice...… she got half the first time and the other half the second time...…………..70's were hard on me..
My buddies Dad did the same thing. She took half the of everything the first time including one of the houses. The other she was able to keep out of the divorce then they remarried put a 180 thousand dollar remodel into it then as soon as it was finished filed for divorce and had to buy her out again. Good luck to you @Otis2u It's much easier to end things in compromise. Hope everything works out as best as can be.
Otis, if you learned anything from this thread, I hope it's this: 1) Don't do anything potentially illegal to hide your collection or its true value. That's just asking for trouble. 2) Stop asking internet coin geeks for legal advice and talk to a lawyer. With that said, I'll leave you with one observation about this comment: Your wife may very well have a legal claim to half your collection, but I doubt she has legal grounds for forcing you to sell it for her. Pending counsel from your attorney, one approach could be to divide the collection into two halves of equal value. Make sure as many of your favorite coins as possible go into your half, and if you have some less-loved coins you've considered selling (most of us do) put those in her half. Just keep the values equal. Turn over her half of the collection to her, maybe along with some recommendations about ways to sell them. There — you've fulfilled your obligation. Should a court rule that you, as the coin expert, must sell her coins for her, you might be able to demand compensation for the time you'll spend doing it. Selling coins at fair market value can be a time consuming process. Just food for thought. But first, get off this thread and into a lawyer's office.
I was 2 weeks from getting married before I dumped her. Marriage license was signed and ceremony set. Perhaps one of my best non-numismatic decisions I ever made in my life. I won't tolerate a man getting violent with me, sure as hell won't tolerate a woman doing it.
Surely I'm not the only one who wants to hear the rest of this story. Come on, Frank, spill the beans.
