mrbrklyn

Every once in a while in every forum someone comes along and after a few minutes decides that they want to turn over the forum, usually to make it "nice". There is a well known model for this among us experienced moderators.

I'm not a moderator here, but in venues I moderate, this is one of the few things I'll hammer down on fast and hard. A thread such as this. It is a very judgmental thread on highly successful environment which has a lot of good people and most of whom have become good friends.

For the most part your spitting into the wind and then complaining about the result.

You need to file your complaints with the proper moderators because frankly, I will continue to be quite blunt about cleaning coins, and I know I've helped a lot more newbies, not only here but just about everywhere on the net. And I'm not alone here.

Frankly, I find your biases about how you perceive the forum should work, not very logical, and and wrong about the dynamics. And that you continue to hammer on this is troubling and bias. But that is what the good ole ignore box is for. Your not only being thin skinned, but you've ignored what others have said to you and just continue with this mantra, just as you did in the cleaning thread.


Ruben

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Coin Talk Museum Exhibits
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mrbrklyn

BTW - that is not your business. I've received dozens of private messages about complaints of other members, and I always either play them down or just forward them to the moderators. Occasionally I've tried to intercede between two members, or even between a member and a moderator. Because in my experience these things either work themselves out, or the complainant themself proves to be a little bit nutty. In any event. When someone feels that a moderator might need to be involved, it is their responsibility to either act like a grown up and use the PM utility, or to contact a moderator. Its not for you to become the representatives of others. trust me, it is hard enough to represent yourself.

BTW - there is no forum rule that says everyone has to like everybody. There is a forum rule about decorum.

Ruben

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"The tremendous problem we face is that we are becoming sharecroppers to our own cultural heritage -- we need the ability to participate in our own society."
Coin Talk Museum Exhibits
http://www.mrbrklyn.com/coins.html

spock1k

Harvey is that you?

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spock1k

ruben thats all very nice and am glad u try to help others out. what i cant understand is why not help some experienced hands finish their collection? u dont have anything against ur best friends do u?

brooklyn is a treasure trove for indian coins

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Boss

I agree with you young guys (I am in my 30's). People can get rude and condescending- no doubt about it. Someone criticized my signature line and has been rude to me since then, which I changed not because I was trying to make them happy or because I feel any differently about the statements in my signature lines. I think people are not always kind on this site, but to be honest this is the nicest one out there as far as I am concerned. There is always a few bad apples, but I think most of the people here are quite nice, for the most part. I think if someone is rude then call them on it right there, in a direct and honest manner. Don't stay away Freaky Garrett, or Jarred.

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spock1k

you nailed it

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Lehigh96

And I think you nailed it.

I read most of the threads on this forum and just don't see condescension, rudeness, or hostility on a regular basis.

I am a very direct individual who has lived my entire life in the Northeast US (PA & NJ). There are times that I think I am being nice that I end up offending people. That is simply a part of the way we communicate in this part of the country.

I don't have any idea if I ever offended you commidaddy, but I know that it is certainly possible. However, I will not ever apologize for who I am. Either you accept me and others for who they are and tolerate their annoying idiosyncrasies or end up offended on a regular basis.

Ben Peters is a perfect example of what this thread is talking about. He was making some rather abrupt and critical posts awhile back and was called out to be nicer. My advice to him was not to change, but allow others to get to know him and adapt to his personality. If he changes, you are not getting the real Ben.

After reading and interacting in threads over time, posts to a new member that seem rude, are just someone being someone to the rest of us.

If anybody really wants to see condescension, rudeness, and hostility, visit the PCGS forum. It will make you appreciate the friendly community that exists here in an instant.

Boss

Don't get my post wrong, Lehigh. I would say maybe 5-10% on a rudness scale here. Maybe 40-60% at NGC and 60-80% at PCGS if I had to unscientifically quantify. Rudeness and condescension are not the norm here, but it is here. I think the biggest problem is communciating without any body language. 92% of so of communciation is body language and nonverbal gestures. What does that mean for cyberspace communications? It is well established fact that communication in relationships that is only electronic or in writing only, results in people speaking much more aggressivley than they would face to face. I'd say 90% of the conflicts I have with my boss happen because he won't answer the phone or come find me and he text me instead. He says something pretty rude and two days later says I misunderstood it. All the while I am thinking he is upset about such and such. This is the problem on not hearing the tone in someone's voice or observing their body language. People need to adjust their tone downward a bit in written communication or it comes off harsher than intended. If one intends to be harsh and rude, so be it, but we shouldn't be suprised if there's a fallout from that. Our words can be a two-edged sword. Just my humble thoughts.

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“Oppressors can tyrannize only when they achieve a standing army, an enslaved press, and a disarmed populace.”
—James Madison

desertgem

Unprovoked condescension, rudeness, and hostility, Wherever it is found, tells more about the source than the intended. In the collegiate academic world, these traits rarely identify the scholar or expert, but someone who is unsure of his position and uses these traits to intimidate others and overshadow his own shortcomings.

If a person doesn't want to answer the same question for the 100th time, then don't answer at all. I missed the memo about having to answer every question ~~Thankfully!!

Tonight we had dinner with a near 90 year old lady who my son adopted as a grandmother after both of his died. We all love her dearly. She still refers to "colored people" and believe all welfare cases are freeloading, but she individually packed up 250 "shoebox" Christmas gifts for children in foreign missions and has tears when telling about her experiences with them. Should we criticize her for being politically incorrect? We all have our good points and bad ones. We all have bad days, weeks, or years. We are a great group of diverse people here. Celebrate our good. Good Karma pays off.

Jim

Lehigh96

Good Post, I agree completely.

PS You just explained why I don't play online poker.

spock1k

i thought u didnt want to get cleaned up by me . i never should have cleaned up the table that day now no one to play and i dont even know how to play properly

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Lehigh96

Spock,

For you I will make an exception. We still have to decide the stakes though.

De Orc

How do we learn? well one way is to ask a question OK so that question has been asked a billion times before so what! If you dont want to answer then dont move on to the next post but do remember that you to might have a question that others look at and think Oh no not again LOL
Now some people will answer by posting a link to a previouse thread great way to do it, the OP will then have the chance to instantly read all the comments rather than wait for a new set LOL
Others will give a full answer again great the one thing that shoudnt happen is RUDENESS, please guy's just have a moments thought before you post

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My Coins 2168 to date 02/06/09 http://www.omnicoin.com/?collection=De-Orc

Speedy

Why? ....I think she was right on Just kidding

Speedy

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Coin collecting is the only hobby in the world that you can spend all the money in the world and still have some left over

commidaddy

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Oh Well.

Jarrid